In today’s world, when we are facing intense competition, running a race in fear of not loosing the battle, battling with own insecurities, one thing that we all are obsessed about is “Personality”, we are cautious about dressing up well, having immaculate mannerism, and getting the communication skills right. This cautiousness is because we are aware that we are observed all the time. People make perceptions and judgements about us the moment they notice us or have first interaction with us. Probably that’s the reason that we put so much emphasis on personality, grooming, appearance and the power of first impression. What I don’t understand is our ignorance towards the real, comprehensive meaning of Personality. Personality is not just looking right, it has deeper meaning than that. We seem to be obsessed with superficial meaning of personality. Before an important meeting, or a presentation, we check ourselves multiple times in mirror to see whether we have got everything right to cast a positive professional image. What we have conveniently ignored is how much important “getting the thought process” right is.
We ensure almost on daily basis, that we look beautiful but how many times we reflect upon the thought if we think beautiful!! I am writing this based upon my experience of having conducted numerous workshops for professionals from varied field on the topic “know the real you”. When I ask them to define themselves in three words, they struggle to answer. Ever wondered why so happens!! It is because we don’t take pause and reflect, we are so busy in competing task A, then task B then task C and so on. We rarely consciously try to connect with ourselves. We rarely think about how we really feel about the choices that we have been making. Are we becoming the best version of ourselves with every passing day, are we becoming the kind of person we really want to be! What is most astonishing is that when same participants were asked to give three words (positive or negative) for their colleague or friend, they answered in seconds!! What does it tell us? It is so because we have championed ourselves in “judging” others, giving them the labels.
When we can’t claim to know ourselves, with what right we form opinions about others and feel so strongly about our opinions, so much so that they become part of our belief system.
One characteristic that is needed greatly is being “non-judgemental”, being “accepting” towards ourselves and others. Only then this world will be a beautiful place. A place where people don’t run a race to defeat each other rather hold hands and walk together!!
Prof. Shikha Sindhu,
HOD- HR, ISBS
Leadership Coach & Beahavioural Trainer.